My parents received a call that night at approximately 8 p.m, from a family member that was at the hospital visiting with my grandma.
She told my mom that my grandma had suddenly taken a turn for the worse, and advised that my mom and dad and I had better get to the hospital right away.
Once at the hospital, I entered my grandma's room with my dad. My grandma was awake and very lucid but was having difficulty breathing. It upset my dad greatly to see my grandma like that, so he chose as other family members did, to alternate between waiting outside her hospital room in the hallway and the private designated "family room waiting area".
With my uncle sitting on the hospital bed beside my grandma on one side, me on the other, and my aunt sitting on the bed at her feet, we all tried to comfort my grandma as she struggled to breathe. After years of heart trouble, my grandma's heart was now failing.
I held my grandma's hand tightly, and like the others in the room, I told her how much I loved her. We all told her that it was okay for her to go, to be re-united with the man she loved; her true love and best friend, her husband, my beloved grandpa.
My grandpa had passed away 8 years earlier, and the day my grandpa died, a small part of my grandma died with him. She was devastated. While she continued to try and live a full, active life, she missed him terribly.
She traveled and tried enjoying her life the best she could without him, but she was truly counting the days until she would be with him again. She talked often of how much she missed him, and admitted that she thought about him each and every single day. She said that he really was her true love, her soul mate.
While laying in her hospital bed, there were a few times my grandma opened her eyes, and was very aware of her surroundings. She looked at each of us, and at one time even asked for my dad. I immediately ran to get him, but by the time he entered the room, she had closed her eyes and had slipped back to not seeming to be aware of anything going on around her.
A few times my grandma would open her eyes again, sit up and lean forward. She would look up to the left corner of her hospital room and say, "Up." She even tried reaching out at something up in that area. Of course none of us saw anything.
My grandma was a very strong woman and even referred to herself as "a tough old bird", so it seemed very fitting that there were a few times we thought for certain she was gone, only to be told by the doctor that her heart was still beating. She didn't go without a fight.
Eventually the doctor came into her hospital room again at our urging, took a listen to her chest again with his stethoscope, and declared that her heart had finally stopped beating. She was really gone.
She passed away only an hour and a half after all of our family had arrived at the hospital. Like everyone else in the room I began to cry harder than I already had been.
Everyone left the room. I simply sat there on the bed beside my grandma, stroking her hair and telling her how much I loved her and how much I was going to miss her.
I was still holding her hand when all of a sudden the room felt really warm. It was as if someone had suddenly turned the heat up in the room.
I can not explain it, but I had the unbelievable "knowing" that my grandma was still in the room with me. I even looked over my shoulder to the corner of the room, up towards the ceiling where my grandma had been looking and reaching and I half expected to see her there. That's how strongly I could feel her presence. It was strange but so incredibly strong.
At that time I was suddenly overcome with a sense of calmness and unbelievable happiness. I can not even begin to explain it, nor do I understand it, but I knew that my grandma was letting me know how she felt.
Somehow I felt it, and I just "knew" that she was with my grandpa again and was elated to be with him. She was happy and at peace. I can not explain it, but I suddenly felt really happy for my grandma and I felt tremendously peaceful.
I got up off the bed, kissed my grandma on the forehead and walked out of her room. In the hospital hallway outside her room I found many of my family members there who were quite upset about her passing and who were crying.
I approached my uncle who was crying and told him what I was feeling and what I had just experienced. He looked at me, stopped crying and then said, "You know, it's weird, I can feel it too."
Days before my grandma passed away, she reported to family members that many times when she fell asleep, upon awakening and opening her eyes she would see my grandpa standing in her hospital room. Then in the blink of an eye he would be gone.
I very much believe that while my grandma's body shut down and died, her soul, her essence; the part of her that we all loved, simply transformed and left her body. Her soul is now somewhere else.
I believe that her soul has traveled on to where we all go when our soul leaves our physical body. I also believe that she is with all of her deceased loved ones, including my grandpa. I believe he came for her at her time of death, as do many of my other family members.
I have to admit that experiencing what I did at the hospital after her death, brought me a lot of comfort. It also lessened my grief after her passing.
I still miss my grandma very much, even to this very day, but I truly believe, without a doubt, that she is in a far happier place with all of her loved ones that passed on before her.
And I know that when my time on this earth is finished, I will see her again.
Me with my grandma
Copyright © 2013 A Haunted Life
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